With this week's news about former NY governor Eliot Spitzer, there's been a lot of media coverage about the role of Silda Spitzer, and whether she should have been at his side during the two press conferences that he held. In most, if not all, of the coverage, a lot of the commentators and "people on the street" have said they couldn't understand why a wife would do that, and that if it were them, they'd be walking out the door as quickly as possible.
Amazingly, nobody was really sticking up for Mrs. Spitzer for her role of being up there supporting her husband and family. Instead, they have offered sympathy (which is fine), but there's still a vast rush towards judgment that she's calling the lawyers as soon as this is over.
Obviously, what Mr. Spitzer is accused of doing was horrendous and shocking, and families have divorced over much less infractions. But marriages have also survived greater infractions. If this marriage is going to survive, there will have to be a lot of open communication, discussion, possible professional help, and yes, forgiveness.
If Mrs. Spitzer were to forgive her husband, how would the media treat this act? Would they be amazed at the act of forgiveness? Would they go, "Wow, there's a woman who wants to save her marriage, in the face of unbelievable odds?" Probably not, instead there would be sarcastic comments about how she was doing it for political reasons, or other such nefarious purposes.
It's been clear over the past few days about the culture that we live in today -- how easy it is for people to rush towards an immediate divorce instead of thinking about ways that couples can work on their problems. Sure, the Spitzer case in an extreme example, but it's also not hard to watch the media rush towards divorce in less-heinous cases. It just highlights how much work we have to convince people about the joys of marriage and the power of forgiveness.
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